I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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