The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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