We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize