Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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