Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
