some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize