i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
