I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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