ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
