Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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