Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
