Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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