i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
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