That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
