Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
