no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize