hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
It's blow job season.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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