Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
