I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
