i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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