she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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