I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
