Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
You can't special order awesome
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
