awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize