I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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