I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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