so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
