just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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