I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
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