Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
