What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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