Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
