They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
