Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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