I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize