So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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