My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
