Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
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