I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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