So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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