I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize