Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
