if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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