I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
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I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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