The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Randomize
