i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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