so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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