why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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