I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
