So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
