What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Randomize